i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Randomize