Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
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