After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just shotgunned beers for America
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I could fuck to npr.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
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