butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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