Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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