how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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