allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
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