I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
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