he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize