oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize