i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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