Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
plz talk dirty to me
Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you.
What!?!?! How are you txting?!
Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend.
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What did we do last night that was yellow?
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
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