We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
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Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
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No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Please don't give away my fajitas
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