mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
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