my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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