I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Randomize