sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize