why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
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