I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
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