last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
I need water and some morals
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
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