i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Randomize