Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
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