so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Randomize