Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
worst night to have a conscience
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize