i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
Randomize