the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Randomize