question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Randomize