i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize