i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
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