An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
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