I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
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