I hate all girls vehemently.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
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