I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
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