Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
Randomize