where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize