covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
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We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
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Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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