Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
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Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
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