shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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