i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
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