We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize