Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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