he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
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