She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
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All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
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I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Randomize