Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize