you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize