why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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