I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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