When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Randomize