Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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