Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
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security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
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i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
I forgot wine drunk hurts
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
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