Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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